I still can't get over how lousy their cheese fries were.
It almost makes me depressed just thinking about it.
For the first time in my life I considered making an appointment with a psychiatrist.
DurIng my downtime late at night I went through my friends list and pondered unfriending anyone that wrote positively about them.
I would describe the cheese fries this way: think of a bag of frozen fries at the grocery store, warm them up in the microwave a bit so they're soggy and not crispy, and throw on some melted cheese that they use on nachos at Little League and AYSO snack stands.
Ok, now that I got that off my chest, I think I can move on with my life.
Usually an opening with that much negatively would lead to a 1 or 2 star review, but to be fair I will rate Shake Shack as a whole:
+1 star for the spaciousness of their layout and overall presentation
+1 for the outdoor seating facing The Strip
+1 for their custard window: I could see myself returning just for this
+1 for their burgers: read everyone else's reviews
+1 for the variety of their hot dog options: hello chicken apple sausage
+1 for the drinks: shakes and beer, and a beer float
-3 stars for the cheese fries
After my meal, I returned to my hotel room and sat in the shower crying.