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| - Hey laaaaaaaadies!
Need a job as a server in a casual/sports/cowboy-themed bar? Do you happen to have a tramp stamp? Muffin top? Not enough boobs for hooters? The IQ level of a kindergartner or less? If you answered "yes" to All, this is the place for you.
Not only will you uncomfortably stop by my table umpteen times while our plates and drinks are still visibly full, but you'll also give us a disappointing look when we tell you, for the umpteen time, that we are OK with food and drink for now. Since you are a *star* employee, you'll ignore that and still say "are you suuuuure you don't want to order more apps? entrees for everyone? shots? No??"
Then you will show us the beer list which will consist on a torn piece of paper, hand-written by you (I can tell by the little hearts on the "i"s) and tell us that those are the Happy hour specials, which we will go off by and order. Then when the bill comes, you'll charge us full price for a Blue Moon ($5) because its not on the Happy hour list, which doesn't actually exist because you forgot to mention that the list you showed us had nothing to do with happy hour.
Woopsies. right? Totes happs all the time, hehe. Luckily your good looks and *charming* personality will totes save you from learning how to serve correctly and letting us enjoy our happy hour time. Good for you * insert stripper name here*, Good for You.
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