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| - Overall, this is a fine resort with a couple of gotchas. And although I've only given it three stars, I would seriously consider staying here again.
My initial impression of Green Valley Ranch is not a good one. We regretfully did not read reviews of the resort here on yelp until the morning we left. This is when we discovered that the GVR shuttle service should be spelled with an 'i' where the 'u' goes in the word 'shuttle'. We arrived the same night as the Country Music Awards and some major commercial real-estate convention was in town. Transportation was difficult to come by, but we lucked into a town car. There is no GVR shuttle past 9 PM.
Now, just to show I don't endlessly complain, I'm going to tell GVR how to fix their shuttle service. So, random GVR drone, when you come to read the reviews on yelp and discover that you have two negative reviews because your guests don't like their fellow patrons, a persecuted teenager, a woman with what seems like something akin to a serious beef with GVR, and damn near every positive review mentions your "shuttle" "service", take heed and book a stay at the Hotel Del Coronado in San Diego. I honeymooned there a couple of years ago, and while the Hotel Del does a lot of things I rather they wouldn't do (nickel and diming takes on a whole new meaning there), they will come get you from the airport. For a fee, of course, because everything there comes with a fee. Except, oddly, the wi-fi, which we'll get to later in the case of GVR.
Now, if GVR were to have a couple or four vans to take people and their luggage to and from the airport for a modest per-person fee, I'm thinking more than a few people might utilize the service. I think you would quite likely turn a good profit on the service.
One of the most annoying things about the shuttle was that the front-desk staff seemed to be genuinely surprised when I informed them that GVR's shuttle was next to worthless. I wonder if they've ever tried to use it.
Speaking of the desk staff, I want to point out to every future guest that reads this review that there is no such thing in the hospitality industry as 'reserved'. Hoteliers are notoriously greedy -- there's a song in the Les Miserables musical that isn't so much satire as it is methodology, and this is demonstrated in spades in the affinity hotel staff, particulary those at GVR, have of telling you that you indeed have a room with a certain bed configuration waiting for your arrival, when in fact, they could care less. My wife does not appreciate being lied to, GVR. If you can't reserve a particular thing for us, say so.
Almost everything else at GVR went off without a hitch. We ate at Feast (their buffet), the Grand Cafe (open all night) and the Original Pancake House. We also ate several catered meals. All of the food was excellent, but some of the waitstaff for the catered events frequently seemed overwhelmed by their duties. The people I met working the bar (Joe and Tiffany, if I recall correctly) at the Grand Cafe were the best that GVR has to offer, hands down. Incidentally, the Grand Cafe's breakfasts tend to run cheaper than the Original Pancake House's.
We sat by the pool for part of the last full day there. It was hard to schedule pool time with my wife, who was sitting in traning sessions in the Estancia ballrooms all day, because the pool closes at 6 PM. This seems arbitrarily early, and appears to me to be more likely as a tactic to drive people into the casino in the evening. I'm not impressed. Be the resort -- keep it open until at least 7 PM at least in the warmer months. I can't imagine that will ever happen though, because of the greed mentioned above and because of the casino acting upon that greed.
Speaking about greed, let's mention the casino. My only gripe about the casino is this: Nevada law says that I can't take my 4 month old son in the gaming area. I have no problem with this, especially as there are handy maps posted with marked walkways that children can walk along. The problem is that the casino manager has decided that those walkways would be excellent places to put slot machines! Dumb, just dumb. It's never, ever, a good idea into forcing your patrons to be lawbreakers.
Finally, why do I have to pay thirteen bucks a day for internet? There's a Panera right over there, and their wi-fi is free. Making hotel guests in a hotel this expensive pay for wi-fi is just plain dumb.
The beds are comfy. I don't do hard beds, but that one was quite nice. The bathroom was spacious and luxurious. Everything was well-maintained and clean. The housekeeping staff was always very courteous and helpful.
Bottom line: be aware that GVR's management's interests are not necessisarily yours. They do provide a good room, great food and nice accommodations. The shopping area outside is nice.
It's a good place to go if you don't expect too much from your high-priced megaresort.
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