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| - During another one of our very rare trips to this "posh" Kierland Commons area, we found ourselves hungry for something different, we walked by the Greene House, actually the baker's window at the Greene House. Turns out it is a small station where smaller plates are arranged in the restaurant, a Garde-manger almost, where salads and breads came out, I think I even saw some desserts potentionally being cooked up there. Nevertheless, the friendly face behind and the intriguing display window drew us in.
It was lunch time on a saturday, the place was pretty busy. We walked in wearing clothes that didn't scream out Scottsdale, but more of the quiet, Millionaire Next Door type of look, needless to say, we didn't get seated at a very good spot. Wearing our t-shirts and jeans got us an awkward table that felt like it was below the bar. Half of our lunch was eaten with a waiters butt in our faces. It's not exactly the type of warm buns I was hoping for with my butter.
The food, being avid and experienced fish and chips lovers, to try the Greene House's rendition was a must, we are no strangers to the great old fashioned greasy spoon fish and chips from accross the pond, England. The result? Surprising, the fish was good quality white fish, if I had to guess, possibly black cod, it came with fries, not chips. "Chips" meaning big potatoe wedges that are finger length. Nope they were just regular ole fries, a mound of it, with two small portions of the fish. The plate was not balanced, the fries outweighed the fish (the main attraction) by a good 5 to 1. Wow.
We asked our very waiter who kept asking us if wanted anything to drink besides our ice cold water, are the Kobe Beef Twin burgers made from grass-fed cows? I thought, Kobe beef, it has to be, you mean to tell me a cow that gets massaged gets to eat grains?! I thought there was no way that he would come back saying it wasn't grass-fed beef, I expected a lie, a lie that would have made me feel happier. Nope, the Kobe beef is from grain fed bovine. That's right... the waiter got 1 point for honesty, and chef, 0. For those who know their meats, beef that is grain fed is like.... humans who only get their vitamins sources from pills and not fruits and meat, un-natural and frankly kinda gross.
When the twin burgers arrived they were small, sliders small. Why not call them sliders? The "house pickles" are these strangely marinated curried cucumbers. Who's idea was that? It overpowered the meat, something that should stand alone really being KOBE no? The beef could have maybe, and that's maybe passed for Angus, Kobe? Not a prayer.
On the upside, the parmasan, truffle fries were good though.
So, I guess I can't really judge this restaurant to its fullest yet, I saw potential in the menu, but also I saw a lot of pretentious combinations that should have been left off the menu, at least simplefied.
I will be back to this place one day, and that time, I will be dressed like David Beckham, wear sunglasses indoors, throw on a sportscoat and possibly designer jeans. Maybe just maybe, then will I have a shot at sitting at one of the great seats in the house where you can see folks walk by outside, or the beautiful open kitchen they have.
Don't miss: The patio seating and atmosphere at night
Skip: the bar half of the restaurants, seats are badly placed, and save your cash with Kobe burgers that barely surpass the gut-bombs from White Castle.
For now Greene House, you get a 3 out of 5. Not good enough.
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