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  • Anytime a new trend develops, you can count on the hipster trendoids loving everything about said trend, paying ridiculously overpriced tabs, and bragging how they got there first. One of the latest trends is, in a need to pretend to be eating healthy, eating some really weird stuff, that is marketed and wrapped in words like ORGANIC, WHOLE and TRUE. "YUMMERS! The Clarified Tibetin Yak Feces on Mandarin Chiffonade Soil Wafers with Escargot Infused Pablano Aioli is the best thing I've ever had." Yeah, Ok. For the trendsetters, trendoid wanna-bes, and lemming followers, this sounds great. There are a few of us, however, who understand that you're just eating YAK SHIT, ON A DIRT CRACKER, WITH SNAILS AND MAYONNAISE. Cut to True Food Kitchen in Scottsdale. With delights on the menu such as TUSCAN KALE SALAD, BUTTERNUT SQUASH PIZZA, "INSIDE OUT" QUINOA BURGER, and SHITAKE & TOFU LETTUCE CUPS, made from quality ingredients like SULTANA, FARRO, COCONUT SHELLFISH BROTH, & TELEGGIO, Yak Shit lovers must be cartwheeling. I made the mistake of ordering a Turkey Burger from True Food Kitchen at the behest of a Yak Shit eating co-worker who "just had to have" a Bison Burger. For $12 you get the following; Turkey Burger, Provolone, Lettuce, Tomato, Avocado, Mayo & Flax Seed Bun. Seems harmless enough, even almost tasty. Nope. It's hard to imagine screwing up a turkey burger this badly. Soggy, greasy, slimy....JUST PLAIN BAD. REALLY BAD!! The patty was dry. The bun was a soaky soggy. The worst, from a place that boasts "Honest food that tastes really good," is the terrible condition of the produce on this burger; slimy to the point of being gelatinous. Just plain gross. I took one bite and threw the rest away. Sorry, True Food Kitchen. I won't be back. Enjoy the KALE-ADE, THE SPAGHETTI SQUASH CASSEROLE & THE GRASS-FED BISON. To me, It's all just Yak Shit.
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