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| - If I ever want to be reminded what kind of asshole I am, I just need to reread this review and I'll know.
Why is this the review that will serve as this reminder when I have so many Yelps explaining so much about that already? Well:
I went here on an anthropological adventure. I'd heard the regulars were noteworthy in a Bikinesque fashion. That they're scary and funny and local and Cheersish... And that everything takes forever. And that everything is average but that it's the combination of the preceding factors that make this place worthy of one adventure to see how the other half live in their natural habitat.
We walked in and were IMMEDIATELY, like within seconds, greeted by a drunken song. A man and a song and a twinkle in his eye and I was immediately charmed.
I was expecting it to smell very strong, especially since they sell cigarettes in the vending machines, but really there was no noteworthy odor.
The bartender was high or drunk. If she was not high or drunk, she's spent so much time in her life being either high or drunk that she now gives off a permadrunkenhigh vibe. For instance, she takes our drink orders and says, "Want menus?" and then walks away and re-asks us our order, which was a pitcher of beer. And then does not ever bring menus. Glazed eyes. I don't give a fuck ethos.
AMF is on the menu, which I had to be reminded stands for adios mother fucker, which is just basically telling the drinker that this particular night will not be one they should bother trying to remember. Here, I could make some grand (albeit stupid) statement about how this is exactly the type of place people come to forget, but I don't think that's true considering I was the only one drinking them.
The one gentleman we interacted with was so desperately lonely that he clung to every vestige of a chance of an opportunity to insert himself in our convo and I felt deep sympathy for him.
All and all, I can't see any reason to ever go back but I'm glad I went and that it exists. It serves a need. It serves a population. It offers an opportunity for snobby a-holes to have a place to go on "anthropological journeys."
Apparently, they put wine in their burgers if you're into that...
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