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| - It's been far too long since I had the time to do a Qype review and some concerned Qypers have lambasted me for my tardiness, while asking after my mental health. Many excuses later, including - not being able to split myself in more directions than ten at a time, getting to grips with minute keyboards on smart phones, where you just know that if you had a chubby Michael Moore trigger finger you'd be sending off the whole damn alphabet. Plus, and the biggest one of all, having to play 'Acting Mother Teresa' in the Press Room while my Editor continues to convalesce in the hospital . But, all of these excuses aside, there are dozens of places on the Globe I've been to since my last review, which seems like eons ago (Hell. Sounds kinda like me kneeling down in front of Father O'Flaherty in a rather claustrophobic confessional box, bent on fibbing my way out of a lengthy penance) Anyway, today I'm determined to tell you about my trip to Alberta, Canada as it left a lasting impression and more importantly, they hold one of their greatest rodeo celebrations on the world calendar, 'The Calgary Stampede.' Held in July every year. (See photo below) Many already know of my love of horses, whether they be Arabs, Thoroughbreds, Stock horses or Rodeo high kickers. I like to think I've ridden 'em all, been thrown by most but dusted off my 'Chaps' well enough and jumped right back on again. 'Englishmen, please note.' I am not referring to your gender, but the leather 'Chaps' so named so as to stop chaffing of the inner-thighs on one's delicate anatomy.
But back to Calgary before I get into below the belt areas, which 'Chaps' invariably like to hear about, almost as much as young ladies like myself who are closing in on the 'Cougar years.' (See photo below) You don't have to be a cowboy to enjoy the world's greatest Rodeo event. Even though, actual participation in events like Steer Wrestling and riding half-psychotic wild Broncos is by invitation only, with over $2 Million up for grabs in prize money - so, a trip to the Hamptons could be on the cards. But, even if this spectacle of witnessing the share skill and brutish strength of our participants, the physical adrenaline flow peaked to its highest point stretching all known muscles to their ultimate limit, and not forgetting, the stubborn determination that brings on that brilliant, unadulterated, climatic crescendo of Yeehaw is too mundane for you, or, you don't like the evening barbecues with lots of juicy spare ribs in hickory sauce, not to mention the tremendous fun to be had line-dancing, you will, at the very least be in a city and a province that is one of the most wonderous places in the world. Yes. When it comes to scenery and the great outdoors, Alberta tops 'em all! (See photo below) This is natures playground. You can hike, fish, climb, paddle a canoe, camp out or kiss a Grizzly Bear. The latter, however, is not recommended for Greenhorns, although some families have - rather unfortunately - persuaded the occasional dim-witted Mother-in-law to try it out. (But that's a grizzly tale for another time or when you're in an 'Edgar Allan Poe' mood so, just let me know). Banff National Park is as famous a Yosemite National Park, with their crystal clear lakes, wild mountain sheep, coyotes and eagles. Mountain trails galore and always a horse close by to ride, all trained to carry the small children more safely than any mountain goat and all the time, even in July through the occasional misty rain, you will see the famous Rockies looming like an ancient god in the distance. (See photo below) But of course the one great thing to remember is, if you are NOT going to Calgary to see The Greatest Show on Earth, that being, the glorious Calgary Stampede, because your partner or family might think you're a 'Hick' for wanting to go to such an event, just make sure they first know that for the last two years Calgary has been voted the 'Cultural Capital of Canada.' The museums, art galleries, shops, modern restaurants and not forgetting, the Wonderful Outback Horse Ranches, portray the entire history of the Canadian Wild West along with the Indian Territories. Canadian history and culture is emblazened everywhere you look. PS: So it is not just about the Stampede, but what all goes on around it to make up the Stampede and upon reflection, if it is going to be a family trip for you and experiencing the wonderful spectacle of this Canadian Province, go ahead and take the wife and kids.Temptations in the wilderness is infectious and may well push yours to the brink, that is, if a Mother-in-law tags along too Just remember, Grizzly Bear Fever is at it's height in July!
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