Being pescetarian, hungry and pseudo-Jewish, I might be expected to exalt this place. Sadly, I do not.
Despite the wonderful dairy restaurant menu, the bagels are underwhelming and the portions are teeny-weeny. The pea soup ($4.89) is delicious but the bowl is what most establishments would call a "cup". I can only assume their "half-bowl" is a spoonful. What actually IS a spoonful are the sides you receive with the "platters" ($9.99-$10.49 for tuna/salmon/whitefish salad). Don't most restaurants practically give away coleslaw and fries just to fill up the plate?
Their cheese blintzes are also good, but if there is a blintz out there that is worth $7 apiece, I haven't met it. And I meet a lot of blintzes.
In summation: United Bakers is an institution, but obviously not for its value. Bring your Bubby, enjoy the lively atmosphere, then go to Gryfe's afterward to fill the rest of your stomach.