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| - Oh, Applebee's, you predictable chain, you. Located in Macedonia, Ohio, otherwise know as the epicenter for hideous, soul-destroying sameness; how I despise you!
Oh, where to start? For one, how does this place or its ilk remain consistently busy? Is this or the unexplainable attraction to other similar chain restaurants somehow a reflection of society? Do the people patronizing boring sameness like this strive for anything above mediocre? Simply put, what is wrong with people?
Applebee's is the poster child for everything that is wrong with the overpopulated, over-the-top, un-original, flair crazed dining landscape of the mainstream American chain.
Cheesy, disingenuous, robotic, intelligent-insulting wait service. Crap schmeared and strung about on the walls in a cluster-fuck fashion. The place is too happy, too bright, tables too sticky, too many kids screaming and I haven't even gotten to the food yet! I struggle to understand how THIS has become an acceptable means of dining!
For whatever reason, most people fear the unknown, but find comfort in sameness. You KNOW what Applebee's offers even before you step foot in the door and what to expect. Your brain is overwhelmed with TV, radio and print ads announcing the latest un-inspiring "Pick-'N-Pair" lunch combos & "Ultimate Trios". It's the same whether you're in Singapore or San Jose, California. To most, this is comforting.
To any future readers out there, please, for the love of God, try someplace new next time you dine out. You may surprise yourself. Take Little Timmy and the family out to a local Mom & Pop eatery instead. You may feel better about yourself upon leaving. At the very least, part of your soul and dignity will still be in tact.
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