I'm not a total snob.
I lied, I'm kinda a snob, particularly about ethnic food. The most ethnic thing about this place is the name, it's that bad.
I would have been quite confused even if I were not a snob.
Long story short, chow mein with no noodles. WHAT? I have never in my life heard this. Chow mein literally means "fried noodles". I ordered shrimp fried noodles and got grocery store frozen shrimp on saucy lettuce with rice.
Best part of this meal was the mountain dew. Don't judge me for drinking Dew either. This was my work lunch and the sugar/caffiene combo kick in the face was a valid need.
I think my egg roll committed suicide. Just now.
I'm totally eating this food as I write this and I'm only becoming more and more convinced that I ordered this food as some sort of punishment. The fact that it's this bad and I'm still eating it tells me I need to see my therapist again because self-harm is wrong.