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http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#funnyReviews
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  • If you're looking for a Jersey Shore douche party featuring DJ Suck, then this is your joint. But that's just your typical day club atmosphere and not why I rated this pool so low. First of all, this place is FILTHY. We walked in and the whole place smelled like urine and drunken desperation. We had a cabana and the little carpet inside was sticky under our feet. The daybed attached to our cabana was lined with towels but they were all stanky and full of questionable stains. Like, seriously? A $1500 cabana and the staff can't change the towels on the day bed? And I cannot convey enough how disgusting the pool was. The water was thick and soupy with random floating debris and hair floating everywhere. It looked like it hadn't been properly cleaned in a month. I stepped in up to my shins and it was at that point I decided that fully submerging in that sewer water would surely result in a staph infection or pregnancy. I got out and had long ass hair stuck to my foot. I was, and still am, totally grossed out. The food we ordered was very good but the staff wasn't super attentive. Again, for a$1500 cabana with auto grat, the service should have been stellar. It was getting to the point where I wanted to put a little bell around my server's neck. Seriously. When I dress up, wait in line, deal with the cockbag doormen, and pay a million dollars for food and drinks, I expect a clean cabana, attentive service and pool water that isn't an eleven on a scale of 1 to Erin Brockovich.
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