They call it Apache Burger but I call it the "Last Chance For Romance". Apache Burger has been a mainstay on Dundas St. W for as long as I can remember. It was the place to go after the bars closed up and hence my nickname for this Etobicoke landmark. During the tail end of the disco era, when bars had their last call at 1:00 a.m. and you still didn't have anyone for the rhetorical last dance there was always a chance you'd get lucky at Apache. It was that kinda joint.
I cannot ever remember being in Apache Burgers when there wasn't a line up. No matter what time of the day or night, there always seems to be a line up. Standing there waiting to get your turn to place your order you can't help but to notice that the owners are major Maple Leaf fans with the walls adorned with pics of hockey players who have come and gone from the beloved Apache Burgers.
I'm not really sure why AB is so darned popular. Ok, so the rings are among the best I've ever chowed down on but the burgers are very much similar to what I spoke about in places like Magic Spot Grill or for that matter the upgraded burgers in Harvey's. Unlike the horrid Hero burgers these patties at least have some decent flavour. I always get the Banquet Burger at Apache. Bring me the bacon baby!
Bubba, who is a ringer for a shorter version of the actor Michael Clarke Duncan, (I don't actually know if his name is Bubba but it's what I've called him for years) is a permanent fixture at the prep table. Everytime I see him and he asks me what I want on my burger I look at him and say "Bubba how many times have I been here before? You know damn well what I want on my burger.." He grins his gold tooth grin and fixes my burger. Don't expect to find any caramelized onions or goat's cheese here. This is Apache Burger, it's all old school.
Everything is plentiful at Apache. Fries come stuffed, piled mighty high into their boxes, as do the rings. My Banquet burger combo set me back $11 which is on par with places like Craft. Coming in to Apache Burger is like visiting an old friend who you know will always be home and welcoming you with open arms. It's not my most favorite burger spot but its the spot I'm most sentimental for.