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  • Terrace on Fifth has such potential. The decor is nice, as is the ambiance with the rooftop on a beautiful summer day (I love those rooftops!). The servers are well-intentioned (although perhaps are in over their heads on busy days). Everything else, however, seemed like a how-to guide for messing up even the simplest of things. How-to mess up: * Sushi rolls: Undercook the rice. Somehow manage to have mushy bits along with the dry undercooked bits. This was almost inedible but I was so hungry by the time the food actually came out that I scarfed it down. * Peach sangria: Have it be too watery and too sweet and taste nothing even reminiscent of a sangria. (Seriously, whoever invented the sangria would be incredibly disappointed.) * Dirty martini: Make it so dirty that it's essentially just olive juice and nothing else. * Chicken wings: Make them way too dry. * Pulled pork nachos: Drench the nachos in a somewhat rancid-tasting sauce so that most of the nachos are soggy. Keep the pulled pork cold. In fact, keep the cheese cold and uncooked. Throw on some jalapenos to make it seem like it has flavor. * Supreme pizza: Take 45 minutes to make a pizza. Have it taste only as good as a microwaved pizza that should've taken 5 minutes but was cooked for 8. Our group was thoroughly disillusioned by the end of all this. One group member ordered a bottled beer (an IPA). "At least that's one thing they can't mess up!" we said, unsuspectingly. When it turned out that the beer tasted funny, we discovered that it had been bottled almost a year ago -- way past what any beer drinker would suggest that you drink any beer, especially an IPA. Apparently, you can mess up bottled beer too! I wish I liked Terrace on Fifth, it's close to Consol so it would be perfect for a pre-show meal or drink, but unfortunately, I think I'm going to have to find a new place for that.
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