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| - (Wait for it.... The reason you should be VERY specific about what you DON'T WANT, even if it seems REALLY, REALLY common sense... is at the end of this one. Ugh.)
I will not be returning.
Everyone was very nice, but no one spoke English and the whole place smelled like old Chinese food and cigarettes. The guy who gave my massage ran in from a smoke break to take me and his skin and fingers reeked of cigarettes - the first thing he massaged was my face, and even though he used scented lotion my face stunk like smoke until I went home and washed it! The towels, including the ones they put on my face, smelled musty and old. Aromatherapy is a big part of a massage experience, I guess no one told them.
The communal room was very cramped and not calming at all, luckily I got a semi private room (the door was open and he kept running in and out).
There was a man in the communal room right next to my space who snored loudly the entire time I was there, sprinkled with bouts of slurping and throat-clearing sounds. Such ambience.
He massaged my entire back half through a double-folded towel and my clothes, it was not very targeted.
I know they soak your feet at the beginning, but it's a terrible routine when you rub someone's feet and then slide your hands back around their face, hands and arms. End with the feet. Not sure why someone would have to tell them that.
Worst part of any massage I've ever experienced happened today:
This dude massaged my ears a lot, not sure why. After a while I became uncomfortable that he was spending so much time on them - I'd prefer more time spent on my hands than my EARS - and then he sticks his fingers inside my ear canals on both sides. Pulls them out. Sticks his fingers back into my ear canals. Pulls them out. Sticks them in again, deeper this time, and then presses toward the middle of my skull really hard. Like, what are you trying to do, exactly?
Is that his Thing? Or is he trying to make me deaf? I don't know where your cigarette stained fingernails have been, but let's not give me a free ear infection with my massage today, I didn't see that part on the pricing list. That's called unwelcome penetration, buddy, I am NOT okay with that in any way at all. Get OUT of my head. Keep your fingers out of my ear holes. Thanks but no thanks. Never ever again. Violated and uncomfortable, worried about the health of my ears. Thanks a LOT.
$35 Regret.
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