| rev:text
| - I went to Prairie with my friend after her pal raved about the place. As we walked in, I quickly realized we'd entered a hipster paradise. The servers are wearing flannels and jeans, the dinner menu is called "supper" and the decor easily could have been done by the set designer of Girls. Not necessarily my scene but whatever. We had come on a Friday during restaurant week so weren't able to get a table. No big deal, there was tons of room at the bar so we saddled up on two empty stools.
There were 2 bartenders working the area. The one who waited on us was friendly, knowledgeable and aggressively hipster. I ordered a draft IPA which I liked even though at $7 I thought it was kind of on the pricey side. My friend ordered some bourbon cocktail which took several minutes of theatrical preparation to make (fire, smashing rosemary, stir, shake, something I'm sure they'd describing as "melding"...a truly eye rolling performance). She was pleased with her drink though. The service from the start was SLOW. We waited a bit for our drinks and even longer to order food. In fact, my friend wouldn't let me talk and made me stare at the bartenders with her until they finally took our order. Kind of an extreme measure to have to take to get service when the bar only seats around 20.
For food, I ordered the grown-up grilled cheese and my friend ordered from the prix fixe menu that was being featured for restaurant week. It was suggested I get my main course with my friend's 2nd course and I agreed. The portions for the prix fixe menu are described as "generous."
So, my friend's 1st course arrives after about 30 mins. She'd ordered brussel sprouts and cheese. She is relatively underwhelmed by the dish but inhales the small portion because we'd been working all day and are getting progressively drunker.
Another 35 mins pass and her 2nd course and FINALLY my meal arrives. I should not have waited until her 2nd course for my food., whatever, I'll take some of the blame for this. Her 2nd course is a paltry serving of a mushroom and rice dish. She is dissatisfied with the dish and of course still starving because she's yet to receive a "generous" or even adequate serving of anything. For my part, I will say my grown-up G-Chi was good. It had apples on it, I liked it. At $11, it was one of the few things on the menu that I thought was priced somewhat appropriately. Meal is done. Plates are cleared. We go back to waiting.
My friend orders an irish coffee to help pass the time. This is not a uncommon item to order at a bar and we expect this to be a simple request. We were mistaken. After way too long, the bartender brings over a black coffee, cream and sugar. We ask each other, what do we think is about to happen here. She sits in front of this coffee for about 5 minutes. Then he brings over two shots of liquors to mix into the coffee because he knows "how specific people are about their coffee so this way she can just mix it to her liking." She is charged for two shots and a coffee. She promptly dumps both shots in the coffee and after a mutual huff, she downs it.
My friend had a 3rd course as part of her order that we're waiting on, Seeing all of our fellow bar patrons come in, sit, eat, pay and leave. We've been here for over 2 hours at this point. Eventually we are the only people left at the bar. The bartender comes over, looking to clear us out, and asks if we plan on getting dessert or want to settle up. I say, "well, she already did order dessert..." bartender replies "oh, do you want me to go out back and beat somebody up for not bringing it out yet?" We kind of laugh and are like no, not necessary and then promptly say to each other what the f*** is going on right now. First of all there is no apology and second of all IT'S YOUR JOB, BARTENDER, likely to prepare the dessert or at least to figure out what's going on...like you should have check on that a full hour ago. So the dessert comes out another 15 minutes after this awful interaction. At the start of this debacle of a meal, the bartender made this whole thing about let us know if you have any allergies or food restrictions, we can totally honor those. My friend mentions she can only have small amounts of milk products. Her dessert arrives with heaping amounts of whipped cream on it. I'm not sure what else we expected at this point. She mentions it to the bartender who is just kind of like "oh yeah, sucks to suck, I guess." We are the last people in the place, finally pay our pricey tabs and leave. There is NO verbal acknowledgement of the horrific service we received, no discount on the check. Had we been more confrontational patrons who'd expected even a minuscule amount of quality service, we would have asked to speak to a manager. In fact even debated it before we decided we just wanted to leave.
It was bad. This restaurant needs to be taken to a Prairie and humanely euthanized. Whatever they're trying to do here...it's just not work.
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