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  • Meijer, oh Meijer. For you non-Midwest folks, Meijer is a local supermarket chain in Michigan, Illinois and other surrounding states. Now, for you non-Dutch aware folk, Meijer is basically prnounced as "Meyer." The "ij" is a "y" sound in the sassy language of the Netherlands. Meijer is a terrifyingly ginormous box store. It's huge. It's not just a grocery store, although it takes care of most of your grocery needs. It also has electronics, entertainment, garden stuff, furniture, ninjas, and probably a small traveling circus in the back somewhere. They even have organic stuff, although it's hard to be true to my California roots and shop organic when it's 3 x the absurdly low prices of the rest of the stuff. Also, Meijer is fantastic at 2 am on a Saturday night (it's 24 hours). You can frolic in the housewares and indulge in the late snacks or get some cheap ice cream. Meijer is horrendous on a Sunday afternoon, as stressed out families and zoned out college students buy their weight in products. Here's a note: AVOID the self-check out lane, or rather, avoid it when a selfish ass middle-aged couple decides that they should buy $150 of items and then complain that they have to find a worker because they had seven special kinds of coupons---COME ON PEOPLE, IF YOU HAVE SPECIAL SHIT, USE A REAL CHECK OUT. I had 13 items. And just wanted to go home. I'm still gonna shop the gigantic store. But grrrrrr, not on Sunday's.
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