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  • Grapevine and I go together like Del Maguey Chichicapa Mezcal and Dr Pepper, but fuggit if I don't enjoy myself here in adult-spring-break-fantasyland. Its awkward at first, how someone my age feels like the GILF-hunter recruiting for the bangbus parked o'er yonder at Martini Ranch or somewhere equally creepy. But once you find your niche and the fat book of songs -- I mean its REAALLY extensive -- then you can kick it a bit and enjoy the reduced rates of Scottsdale's version of what I imaging the bar at Club Med to be like ... lots of Tommy Bahama and Ann Taylor A-line dresses with Hibiscus prints ... everyone in Finn Comfort sandals. Anyway, between your enthusiastic head nods through Don From Sales' rock n roll air-flute to Jethro Tull's 'Aqualung' and The Ladies of Sun Valley Office Park Suite B14's interpretation of Tiny Dancer, you can sign yourself up. Graham C has balls the size of watermelons and after a small amount of coaxing, was convinced by our small party to rock the mic to Arctic Monkey's 'I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor'. Por favor, beleive that there is nothing more exciting than four twentysomething dweebs holding their Amstels mouthward, Marlboro 100's [hey, its all they sold at Grapevine] behind the ear like they're playing a sold-out Wembley belting out: "DANCING TO ELECTRO-POP LIKE A ROBOT FROM NINETEEEEN EIIIIIGHTY FOOOOOUUUURR!" "FROM NINETEEEEN EIIIIIGHTY FOOOOOOOOOOURRR!!" Graham is teh tits.
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