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  • Went to O.Noir using a Groupon recently. Restaurant Groupons are something of a scam. I get that I am supposed to tip on the full amount - I can do the math - the 'non-negotiable' automatic 15% tip on the total INCLUDING tax is ludicrous. Given this was not disclosed in advance or on the Groupon, it's also not legal. A gratuity is a gratuity, and I would have given my host Nasir a larger tip given the option to set my own bar. Smart businesses know that customers are marketing vectors and correspondingly treat them well, even if they are there on a deal. Unfortunately, O.Noir is pleased to rely on its position as a novelty experience rather than stand behind its food and service standards to drive more customers through the door. Their prerogative I suppose, but it can't be good for repeat business. I was also charged a random $15 dollar charge 'for using a Groupon' which was not stipulated anywhere on the deal. This is truly what made me feel cheated and left a sour taste in my mouth. My bill was identical to what it would have been without the deal = lame. The wait to pay for said bill post-meal was crazy - they could use a more streamlined payment system (two operational tills would be nice). The food itself was hit or miss - drink prices weren't outlandish, though considering you're apt to knock one over, this is a good thing. I had the steak, which was great - my girlfriend had the shrimp/risotto, which was way oversalted and overdone to the point you could patch drywall with it. The atmosphere is what you are here for, but even blind you can feel banquet style chairs and inordinately tight spacing with other couples/groups. Your other senses heighten and you end up hearing a lot of other peoples' conversations very audibly, and I happened to be seated next to the most vapid and inanely redundant human beings in existence, rendering the experience even more unpleasant. Guests in our room almost got in a blind fistfight over somebody using an indiglo watch for a second, which was entertaining in a Jerry Springerish sense. That second star is for the host Nasir - he's a righteous dude. Too bad given my experience it's unlikely myself or anyone I recommend restaurants to won't get to experience his charm.
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