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| - I love this place. There. I said it. I just couldn't wait until the end of this review. Seriously, if it was possible to have a soulmate in a bar, this is mine. Rowley Inn is a place where I can finally feel comfortable as a 40-ish year old man. Where I'm not adrift in a sea of Millennials spewing you know's and likes with reckless abandon. The crowd here is just right for me. A beautiful mix of sort of middle age and 50+. Quiet, courteous and just right. Like others, I'm reticent. I want to share my experience but I also want to keep this place to myself and the others that already know about this Cleveland gem. Alas, as a Yelper, it is my duty to share and share I must.
Rowley Inn is a neighborhood bar in every sense of the word. Located right across from the famed Christmas Story House, it's situated on an average corner on an average street in an average part of town. Perhaps average isn't the right word. I'm at a bit of a loss. Maybe it's because Rowley Inn is just as it should be. Zero pretension. No aires. It just is and that's perfect.
The inside has a well-worn, historic feel that only decades of loyal patronage can imbue. It feels like a place you've been a thousand times. It has its own smell, it's own sense of light and time. String lights swagged about, a wood bar that runs the length of the space notched by countless elbows and sweaty pint glasses of cold beer. Black vinyl clad seats calling to weary asses. As soon as we walked in I knew. This was it.
The service is pure Cleveland and, for an outsider, may seem slightly cold and distant. I know better. I play by the same rules. We Clevelanders are not about in-your-face, forced hospitality. We don't wear smiles like a mask. We're slightly reserved to those we don't know. We hold back, but only at first. I could sense that if we continued to visit we'd be welcomed into the fold, but it would take time. During our two visits, drinks were always filled. Food delivered to the the table in a perfectly choreographed routine that has clearly played out countless times, and just the right amount of attention. Again, just right.
The draught beer selection is not large, but it's well-curated and features plenty of local love. We're talking Platform, Thirsty Dog, Brew Kettle, Sibling Revelry, all great stuff. They've also got a bottle list with some diamonds amongst the kimberlite. And their happy hour (Mon - Fri 2 til 7) is among the best in Cleveland. $1.50 Domestics and well liquor, $2 off draft beers, wine and specialty cocktails, $1 off imports and craft beer bottles / cans, $5 burger and fries, 50% off select appetizers. I told you it was good.
The food is just spectacular. Incredibly affordable and so satisfying. I want them to make me dinner every night. It's like these guys have decided to call out all other bar fare for the lame, bland, frozen gunk that it is. Everything I've had here has been supremely satisfying, delicious and prepared with an attention to detail that can only come from a cook and kitchen staff that prides itself in a job well done. Everything is prepared fresh and local ingredients abound. Nothing crazy, just simple food executed brilliantly.
Their soft pretzel - among the best in the area - is baked by local Zoss Bakery. Soft and glutinous inside, golden, crispy and salty on the outside. The only downside? Not enough of their delicious beer cheese dip. The spinach salad is fresh, crispy, and perfect for sharing. Bits of crispy bacon, toasted walnuts, funky blue cheese. Two other standouts - the Pierogi and Kielbasa dinner (two local sausages, two deliciously obese pierogi, kraut, cabbage - pure Cleveland in edible form) and the Bumpus Hounds Lunch (a masterpiece, turkey dinner in open-faced sandwich form smothered in gravy and creamy, buttery blue cheese mashed potatoes) are must-try's that I know I'll be having again and again. Oh, and the mac and cheese would make Sara Lee ashamed to use the term. The crispy topping really makes it.
Some other things to mention - they have breakfast all day, their fish and chips is so damn good it will make London question whether or not they're doing it right, and the burger is cooked perfectly with a char that's clearly artist level stuff. Sorry, I'm rambling - and getting really, really hungry.
I know I'm gushing and it's a bit out of my character to do so, but places like Rowley Inn have the effect on me. I simply can't say enough good things here. But you probably shouldn't? come here. Really, you wouldn't like it. It's not for you. Maybe you'd be better off heading down to Professor or maybe over to W. 25th and...I'm sorry. I can't keep up the charade. Make your life better and visit this place now. Just try to tell your "younger" friends that they wouldn't like it. We shouldn't have to share it, right?
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