rev:text
| - I thought I was a sucker for a $.99 cent hot dog served up with a side of DEEP FRIED Twinkie and Oreo's. It sounded even better with an Ice Cold beer. My stomach disagreed.
Immediately I waddle back to my hotel and lie on the bed. Right when I'm about to fall asleep my stomach always picks the right time to have a conversation.
My Stomach, " WHY? Love WHY? grrrrble errr brrgg brrrgg What have you done? grblgrblgrbl brrggg brrggg gurgle gurgle gurgle"
Me, " Look, I make sacrifices for you. You think I like eating salads all the damn time? Grow up. Take one for the team. We're in this together."
My Stomach, " You're a bitch. grrglr grrglr"
Me, "I'm sorry, I promise we won't go back for at least a year. Now get some rest, we'll deal with this in the morning."
My Stomach, " Grrgl grrr grrr, You wanna mess with me huh? I'm not waiting till the morning."
Me, " Quiet down, you'll wake the neighbors."
As I run to the bathroom, the other half walks in the hotel room, "Smells Funkay?"
My Stomach, " She wanted to wait till the morning but I'm calling the shots now. Team this."
Me, "Oh it's on now, pass me the menu, I want to order room service."
My Stomach," And you wanted to fit into your bikini by summer? Ha, Fat chance Fatty."
Me," Okay you win, we'll get those abs by summer, no more deep fried twinkies."
|