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| - I just wrote this review and I need to post it PRONTO
Then I have to leave to go ride my horse named TONTO
I could say bad things about it but I don't WANT-TO
Because the truth is, I LOVE TORONTO!
When I'm on Tor, I usually want to move Onto the next city, but not so much when I'm in the largest city in Canada, which has so much great food and so many great memories, despite never really giving me an excellent crowd for one of my concerts. But then neither have Boston, Chicago, San Francisco, Seattle, and so on - so maybe it's a big city thing.
Toronto is one of the most amazing cities in the world. Nowhere is there a city that is at once as liberal, as clean, as safe, as relaxed, as friendly, as multicultural, as affordable, with as much to do and eat, as Toronto. However, you can't have everything, and what Toronto lacks is livable weather. For months a year (sometimes as long as 5 months) it's severely cold, often below freezing for weeks on end, and occasionally so far below freezing that it's lethal to be outside for too long. Yes, it's that cold here. And this is the southernmost part of Canada, too. Lol.
But what it lacks in warm climate during the winter, it makes up for with beautiful, mild summers, and some of the most beautiful women in the world too. In terms of girls it's like the Los Angeles of Canada. I'm left open-mouthed a lot of the time. It may be that Toronto men are a lower standard of cuteness or that girls here like whiny English Yelp boys with long hair, but the stunning women here seem much more interested in me than some of the similar lovely girls south of the Canada-US border. Oh how I love visiting Toronto.
For things to do, definitely go up the CN Tower. It's spectacular. It's also expensive, which is why you'll probably only want to do it once. Wander around hippie central (Kensington Market) which is also hipster central, as well as nearby Chinatown. Koreatown on Bloor is great too. Go up and down Yonge Street as well as west on Queen St and King St for lots more ethnic delights. Try the St Lawrence Market and the Quayside and The Danforth. The "Taste Of Danforth" Greek festival in summer is especially exciting with hundreds of thousands of attendees and lots of great food. Toronto FC is one of North America's most exciting and well-supported soccer teams, and other sports here are passionately followed too (especially Hockey).
The part I'm really into (I mean after all this is Yelp and look at the size of my tum) is the food. I used to (ashamedly) think that Toronto food was sub-par. That's because I hadn't tried the really good sh** yet. Here's a list of the very best of the best.
My list of my fave Toronto stuff, not complete yet:
https://www.yelp.com/list/v-canada-toronto-area-toronto
For food, try the Pork or Beef Banh Mi sandwiches at Banh Mi Boys (either location). Get Fried Pork N Chive dumplings from Dumpling House - some of the best you'll ever have. Also try Yummy Yummy Dumplings. Grab a Chicken Tikka Masala Roti from Mother India. Try Doubles next door at Al's. Get sausage rolls and pies at Brick St Bakery (as well as some dessert items below). Get Pork Bone Soup from Seor Ak San (Korean). Get Peruvian Chicken, beans and rice from Henry's.
Also try Pupusas at Tacos El Asador. Zet's has good Souvlaki 24 hours but is a little pricy. The Peameal Bacon inside St Lawrence Market is famous, but make sure you go to the original stand, not the fake ones near the entrance.
For drinks, try the Bubble Tea at the chains (Sharetea, Gong Cha, Coco). Sharetea: Okinawa Milk Tea. Gong Cha: Oolong Milk Tea w Brown Sugar (not on menu). Coco: Milk Tea. Get the hot versions of those drinks if it's cold. Green Garden Bubble Tea is excellent too.
For dessert, head straight to The Danforth. Start with Athens Pastries. Order the Loukamades (Honey Balls) and you'll be in heaven. The Galaktoboureko is good too. Then stop by Von Doughnuts virtually next door and try their incredible Creme Brulee. It's perhaps the best donut outside NYC - in the world. For the best ice cream in Canada, go to Ed's Real Scoop, East of downtown. So many amazing flavours. Get Portuguese Custard Tarts (Pasteis De Nata) from Brick St Bakery and Golden Wheat (especially in the morning when they're hot). And try a custard fish from any of the Kevin's Taiyaki locations.
Other great spots include Ave Maria (Venezuelan), Brazil Bakery, King Palace (Indian), Nguyen Hong, Progress Bakery, San Francesco Foods, Rayhoon Persian (in Burlington), and many more.
I know you're crying at the thought of all this great food (Tearonto), and all these places are honestly, truly great (Trueronto), so if you want to go around and try them all (Tryronto), a sort of Fox-esque food tour (Touronto), ending at the top of the CN Tower (Toweronto), now I have to make like a Norse God and get out of here (Thoronto), and if you're cute and have a lisp then in the morning, I promise you'll be walking side to side (Thoreonto).
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