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  • I'm in one of those phases where my life is on a downward spiral, so Wendy's feels like an appropriate theme-food. In fact I think I pretty much only eat fast food when things are a little bit weird. But don't worry reader, this is still a food review - not a cry for help. I came by here one evening in search of some nourishment that would not exit my bowels in an explosive fashion. I feel that's not too high a demand to put on my meals, though with fast food you can almost never be certain. And while I WAS eating fast food, I didn't want to go whole hog and commit culinary suicide by eating a baconator. As a side note, I once saw an old woman trying to kill herself at a Wendy's. What I mean by that is she was about 80 years old with a breathing tube in her nose, sprinkling EXTRA salt on a hamburger. Death by food - an unconventional choice. I ordered the spicy chicken sandwich with a side salad and a sprite to drink. I ordered it to go. Now, here's something that seems frivolous and unnecessary. I'm like, 95% sure Wendy's butters their buns. As if the calorie count wasn't high enough! It tastes delicious of course, but it's only slightly excessive. Aside from that discovery (and perhaps because of it) my Spicy Chicken sandwich delivered on my incredibly low expectations. But then I was blown right out of the water like a Somalian pirate ship that made the mistake of trying to loot an aircraft carrier. Their side Caeser salad is actually right on par or superior to that of a sit down restaurant. Probably because sit-down restaurants keep their salads in giant buckets and scoop it out with big ugly metal spoons like some sort of cartoon cafeteria. Anyways, this salad restored my faith in humanity a little bit. I especially appreciated the cheese flakes and the croutons. Good work Wendy's, you made salads that are actually worth consuming out of a little plastic box. I did that weird thing I do where I order a meal to go and then immediately consume it in my car, right outside the restaurant. Am I alone in that? Oi, vey.
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